Who Am I?
I am searching for something. I don’t know what it is but I won’t be satisfied until I’ve found it. I CAN’T continue to live this way. The pit of my stomach aches all the time for something other than food. I feel as though I don’t have a place in this world. I don’t feel quite comfortable with my current living arrangements, and don’t feel wanted at home with my husband.
I’M ALONE. I need a place where I can go to be free to be totally ME. I’m sure nothing or no-one, or no amount of want from another man will fill this emptiness. I don’t know what I’m feeling. Is it the guilt of hurting a loved one so many times? I cannot state. I have decided to cut everything and everyone back and fill it with the Holy Spirit. AN UNSATISFIED SOUL IS AN ACCIDENT WAITING TO HAPPEN. At this rate, it is inevitable. I can no longer be with him. It feels great, but it’s not love. I know how that feels. It feels safe and comforting. I’ll never be able to get back to that place where we were before because I’ve changed. I wasn’t a faithful believer back then; but now, I hold myself to a higher standard and don’t measure up. I need my spiritual life to be in order. I want not only to hear the word of God but be a catalyst for others; for them to see that light shining in me. This nonsense ENDS TODAY!
I AM a WIFE, a MISTRESS, a DAUGHTER, a SISTER. But ULTIMATELY, I AM forgiven.